Shocking news from Ukee!!

Posted on August 23, 2005 by clubfredbaja
Hello again from the land of whales, Wallys and wetness!

Parents prepare yourselves! What I am about to tell you is shocking and
horrifying and scary too. Yesterday, while I was walking through my
neighbourhood I saw…(are you sitting down?)…some children, small
children unaccompanied by adults, picking blackberries!!! I know, I
know. Almost unthinkable in this day and age. Oh the humanity!

Now before you call the local authorities, put down the phone, let me
finish (be strong). OK for those of you who may not know, blackberries
growing in the wild are on vines covered in large, deadly, pointy
spikes that can rip a childs’ flesh right open!!!  Imagine some
innocent young angel being cut open and bleeding all for the sake of a
berry that can easily be purchased from the local grocery store. But
that’s not all! There are also bees that fly around where the berries
are, and spiders living among the vines and…I almost can’t go
on…dirt, yes, dirt that gets on the berries that the children could
consume without first washing and sanitizing!!! Where were the parents,
I ask you, where were the parents? Neglect, abuse!! (Note to self:
write letter to editor about irresponsible parents in Ukee).

Folks, I am a woman of action and I simply won’t stand for this. First
I am petitioning for the immediate removal of all blackberry bushes in
Ukee. Now, now, you bleeding hearts who think it’s important for
children to see blackberries, don’t worry – I’ve already thought of
that. I will create a building where children, accompanied by adults of
course, may come and view the blackberry bushes behind the safety of
thick glass. My "Blackberrium" will be exactly like experiencing
blackberries in the wild (for the low cost of $19.95 per person,
children under the age of 1 are free) without the danger! There will be
pickings twice a day where happy familes can watch trained experts pick
the berries. I’ll have an IMAX film, "Berry Extreme!" ,and a souvenir
shop and lovable berry-themed characters that you can have your photo
taken with ($9.95 per person) and, sigh, for those who  insist
on actually picking the berries I will offer a supervised exhibit where
children (over the age of 16 and accompanied by an adult) wearing
protective gear, helmets and safety goggles can pick the berries
($29.95 per person for 3 minutes) and eat them once them have been
pressure washed and sanitized. (Note to self: Write several anonymous
letters to city council asking for a "Blackberrium" before I apply for
my permit)

That sounds like an awful lot of work though, doesn’t it? Wait! I have a better idea!

I say we forget wild blackberries entirely. I mean who really needs
them? A few birds? Some bears – oh don’t even get me started on those! No, I say the blackberries should be put where they belong…on a farm, where all real
food comes from. I’m thinking that we can still offer kids the
blackberry picking experience from the comfort and safety of their own
home. I’m talking technology. I’m talking about a video game!!!!

Oh yes! In my game, children can pick blackberries to their hearts
content in complete safety. (Note to self: Begin writing Nobel Peace
Prize speech) It will have to be challenging though so there will be
bonus points if you use your martial arts skills to beat up the other
kids and steal their blackberries and even more bonus points if you
shoot down the police who come to arrest you for stealing (kids will
have their choice of weapons because choice empowers young people and
creates good self esteem). And don’t even start on me about the
violence, we all know there is no connection and besides I’ll put a big
sticker on in like "NOT FOR KIDS UNDER 17 YEARS OLD" and then we can
all be totally guaranteed that kids under 17 will never, ever play it. I’ll call it "Grand Theft Blackberry". Wow, sometimes I impress even myself.

Parents you can expect some flak from those left wing, do-gooders "Oh
but nature is important, children should experience it and learn to
protect it, blah blah blah". I’ll need your help and support because
they’re bound to bring up the fact that I don’t actually have kids and
well, that’s true, and not having kids means I can’t possibly know even
one thing about raising them – as I’m sure you’ll all agree. So I’ll
need signatures on my petition from concerned parents like you!

Well folks, gotta fly, I’ve got some blackberry bushes to go cut down before I have my afternoon martini and watch TV!

Until next week, I hope this finds you healthy, happy, lovin’ life and blackberry-free!

Removing tongue from cheek…
The Princess

Posted in Humour and satire | 3 Comments

Finger Pointing

Posted on August 16, 2005 by clubfredbaja
Hello again from the land of whales, Wallys and wetness!




I’m about to tread some dangerous water. I had two different topics I
considered writing about this week. The first is a lighthearted look at
relationships which would probably get me a couple of sweet emails from
friends. The second is the sort that  would prompt a few 
"take me off the list immediately"  emails. I’ve chosen the second
topic. Why? Because the first topic is one that I can write about and the second topic is one that I should write about.




I begin with a caveat…




I like Americans. Among my many American friends are some of the most
intelligent, kind and ethical human beings I have ever met. I am
eternally thankful for having them in my life.

The story begins like so…





Recently I had a good little e-debate with my friend Steve (one of the
Americans I just wrote about) about war, politics, and
American/Canadian relations. He expressed his unhappiness with
Canadians pretending to be such great friends and neighbours and then
bad mouthing America to everyone else. I found this a little
disturbing, especially when I considered that recently I’ve caught
myself saying, "F-ing Yanks" in regards to some activities going on at
the docks here…but more about that later.




The poet Robert Burns wrote, "Oh would some power the gift he give us, to see ourselves as others see us"
and with that in mind I decided to try and paint a picture of how
Americans might see Canadians and vice versa ( I could be totally off
base but here goes):




Americans see us as enjoying all the benefits of living next door to
the world’s greatest super power without ever wanting to ‘get our hands
dirty’. Sure the world loves Canadians, we’re so polite, we’re so
peaceful but it’s the U.S. doing all the nasty jobs it takes to truly
keep the true north strong and free. And in return for all this Canada
goes around abusing our neighbour to all the other countries who will
listen. Some friend, huh?




Canadians see Americans as the big, tough kid we happen to live next
door to who always seems to be getting into a fight and trying to drag
us in with him. Sadly, the stereotype of the loudmouth, not-so-bright,
rude, rich cowboy is alive and well in Canada. Canadians believe that
the Amercians feel they can go into any country and do whatever they
want, whenever they want knowing no one will stop them.




Which brings me to the docks of Ucluelet.




Whether people want to face it or not, the world’s oceans are in big
trouble. In BC, it’s been a long, tough, struggle to bring the salmon
stocks back up to where they should be – and we’re a long
way from being there still. Regulations for recreational and commercial
fishers in this province are quite strict (although I feel they should
be even more so) and we are slowly starting to see some results. The
salmon is an important, almost totemic, part of our culture and the
majority of locals – though they may whine – respect and adhere to the
DFO (Department of Fisheries and Oceans) regulations when sport fishing
for salmon. Still, the Prez and I (mostly the Prez) see a lot of
illegal activity going on around the docks and the offenders are almost
always…sorry to say this… American.



DFO regs state that
you cannot can fish anywhere outside of your permanent residence and
yet there are a whole whack of RV’s with U.S. plates and canners going
full steam ahead right here, right now. And that is just one
example of the crimes being committed here. The local DFO officers must
be itching to put the Prez on their "block caller" list as he has
called in to report so
many times. Unfortunately, the DFO simply does not have the manpower to
enforce all the regs all the time. One day the Prez had had enough and
confonted an American at the dock with some illegal (non-hatchery)
Coho. "You know that’s not legal right?" says the Prez. "Yep. Oh well,
they’re dead now" says the American. And so, my friends, the stereotype
lives on.



But wait, the story takes another interesting turn…



I like to do my
homework before I write anything factual so I hopped on to the internet
to surf among DFO regs, salmon stats, etc. and came upon an
"enlightening" article on the David Suzuki website (David is my hero)
regarding McFishing, my place of employment. If you want to read all
that was written, I’ll send you the link but basically Suzuki slams
McFishing and it’s parent corporation for essentially running a
commercial fishing operation under the guise of a sport fishing resort.
Gulp. Then came the little voice in my head, "You knew they were unethical when you went to work there, didn’t you?" and
that voice is never wrong. I learned a little phrase when I went to
Alanon after my divorce from my alcoholic husband, "Every time you
point a finger, there are three more pointing back at you." Ouch.



So I’m still angry
with the Americans who come to this town to poach fish and break laws
and thumb their noses at us…but I’m a little less self righteous now.
I guess I’ll have to work on cleaning up my own back yard first, then see what I can do to deal with my neighbours.



And just to set the record straight before the angry emails…



Are Americans the
only ones who fish illegally here? No. Do Canadians ever break the law
in the U.S.? Yes. Isn’t illegal sport fishing just a drop in the bucket
compared to the many other factors threatening the salmon stocks? 
Sadly, yes. Have I
ever broken any fishing laws, local or otherwise? No, not that I’m
aware of. Doesn’t it bother me that I work for a scumbag company?
Sigh…yes. Do I still like Americans? YES.



Check out David Suzuki’s website – it’s enlightening.



Until next week (well those of you who return), I hope this finds you healthy, happy & lovin’ life!

The Princess









Posted in News and politics | 2 Comments

Cue the Jumping Whales

Posted on August 10, 2005 by clubfredbaja

Hello again from the land of whales, Wallys & Wetness!

Let me fill you in on a little secret folks…nature does not care about you. Nature doesn’t care how far you travel, doesn’t care about your schedule, doesn’t care how much money you’ve spent, doesn’t care if it’s your birthday, doesn’t care about you period. Our love for nature will always be unrequited, accept that.

Now why would I tell you that? Well, you see I’m noticing an interesting trend in the
travel market – “Eco Tours”. In theory, eco tours are great. Get out there and have a good look at nature with someone who knows a little bit about it, maybe learn a few things on your vacation. The problem is the expectations of many of the people going on these tours.

At McFishing we have a 3 hour boat tour through the Broken Island Group called the
“Marine Eco Adventure Tour”. It used to be called a “Nature Cruise”.What’s changed? Nothing, just the name. I’m not sure what is so “eco” about a big, diesel spewing boat that gets washed down with bleach and Pinesol (which go running off into our harbour) or where exactly the “adventure” part comes in (well, if the deck is slippery you could fall and hurt yourself I guess). Well, on Sunday,one of the skippers told me he had a very irritated guest who was complaining because she did not see a bear and we had told her she would.

What?! I know for a fact that we never tell people that they will see anything .
We do tell people that there is a chance they might see whales, sea lions, eagles, otters, bears, and dolphins but noguarantee. So where did this woman get the idea that she would see a bear, as if the bears are all waiting for a phone call from us, “Hey
guys, yep we got a boat coming by at about 3:45 so be ready. If you snag a salmon out of the water when they go by there’s an extra fifty in it for you“?

The more I thought about it, the more I realized that this woman’s disappointment is not
an isolated incident. In Costa Rica I can remember talking to tourists who were really bummed out because they’d come all that way to go on a jungle tour and hadn’t seen hardly any wildlife, not even a monkey. And even the Prez and I have had some uncomfortable moments with guests out on our boat in Mexico looking at the quiet water then looking at us like, “So where the heck are the birds and the dolphins and the whales that you guys are always going on and on about?” I feel for them but the reality is that wildlife comes and goes. Sometimes nature puts on a show, and some things you can be guaranteed to see at certain times but a lot of the time nature is pretty quiet and calm.

The Prez and I have seen a lot of cool stuff simply by virtue of having spent loads of time
out on the water. I can tell you that many of those hours on the water we saw nothing but…well…water.

City and suburban folks, raised on zoos, aquariums and Discovery Chanel shows pick up
glossy brochures showing spectacular breaching whales, cuddly sea otters eating sea urchins, and magnificent black bears with their cubs strolling along the seashore then they load up the SUV and head out to Ukee with visions of wildlife dancing in their head. They head out on a McFishing Marine Eco Adventure Tour, the fog rolls in, they see nothing
except maybe a sea lion. Or–this actually happened during all of February–they read some travel magazine article about the new “storm watching” phenomena, complete with photos of 30 foot waves breaking on the shore, hop a plane and check into a $200 per night B&B only to find that it’s clear, sunny, and the ocean is flat calm…oops! And that’s just the way it is folks.

Nature has something to teach us: life is not predictable. Expectations and hopes are great but if you let them rule your life you are bound to be disappointed. Hope for the best, prepare for the worst and enjoy everything in between. If you had told me 3 years ago that I would end up broke, renting a duplex, and working at a fishing resort in one of the wettest places in BC, I would have laughed in your face…but here I am. The hardest thing about the last two years of my life has been letting go of  “what should have been” but now that I have, now that I am enjoying “what is”, life is wonderful. Last week I was walking to work, watching a majestic bald eagle make lazy circles over my head, the sky was a vivid blue and the air was clear and fresh. At that moment I was the luckiest person on the face of the earth. No I’m not where I expected to be but where I am is amazing.

So you didn’t see the whales jump out of the water this trip, maybe next time or maybe you’ll never see them…but if you’re lucky enough to be out on the water, you’re lucky enough.

“You can’t always get what you want but if you try sometime, you just might find you get what you need.”  – The Rolling Stones

Until next week, I hope this this finds you healthy, happy & lovin’ life!
The Princess

Posted in Animals, Environment, Nature & Environment, Nelson - British Columbia, Travel | Leave a comment

Tourist Season

Posted on August 2, 2005 by clubfredbaja

Hello again from the land of whales, Wallys and wetness!

Before I start, let me just wish my hubby, The Prez, a very Happy,
Happy Birthday!!! He actually turned a year younger yesterday as he
thought he was turning 45 and I pointed out to him that he was actually
turning 44. Love you sweety-pie! xoxo

**


Another long week at McFishing full of the trials and tribulations of
dealing with tourists – thank goodness for martinis and chocolate!

In Ukee, we call the three and a half month, peak tourist season “The
100 Days of Hell” and sometimes the name is dead-on, let me tell you.
Don’t get me wrong, I love travelers, I love meeting people and helping
them in a new destination, however,
the resort I work at caters to the lowest common denominator. Mixed in
with all the regular tourists are a large number of wingnuts – I’m
talking stupid with two “o”‘s.

On top of the drive-ins, McFishing has two daily plane loads of guests
which yours truly meets and greets at the airport. These flight guests
are usually drunk, often missing teeth, and are ready to make the best
of their three days away from the old ‘Ball and Chain’.  During
the half hour bus ride back to the resort I give them some information,
fill out registration cards, fend off wandering hands and try not to
get drunk myself off all the fumes. Over the past three months I’ve
noticed a correlation between the amount of alcohol a man consumes and
how charming and handsome he thinks he is. I once had a drooling,
farting, Jabba-the-Hut-type man ask me if I wanted to come to his room
for (wink wink) ‘french lessons’ (insert rude tongue gesture here). He
thought this was hysterical and looked genuinely surprised when I,
politely, declined. So I’ve nicknamed our bus “The Meat Bus” – if you
haven’t already guessed, I’m the meat.

Then there are the nice tourists who ask you the same set of questions,
or make the same joke, over and over and over again. My favorite is
when I’m down at the dock and I ask someone for their fishing licence
(this is so I can write down their name and address to mail their fish
photo to) and at least once a day one will say, “Licence? I didn’t know we needed a licence?” and then laugh heartily with their buddies. This joke was funny for three days. Ninety days later? Not so much.

Of course, there are also things the tourists say not meaning to be
funny but which are a complete hoot to those of us who live here. Some
of my faves:

(The weather in Ucluelet is
incredibly unpredictable. We can get four seasons in one day and we
don’t pay too much attention to weather forecasts – even a day ahead of
time.)
Tourist: “Hey, it’s rainy and windy here!”
Me: “Yep”
Tourist: “But…but I checked the weather report on the internet last week and it said it  was supposed to be nice!!”
Me: “Yep”
Tourist: “But…but…”

*

Tourist: “Where’s a nice place to hike around here?”
Me: “Oh, definitely the Wild
Pacific Trail. Start out at Amphpritrite Point so you can see the
lighthouse and the waves crashing on the cliffs!”
Tourist: ” Well we went out there but there were signs all over the place warning about bears, cougars and wolves.”
Me: (shrugging) “And…?”
Tourist: “Bears, cougars and wolves!!!”
Me: “Uh huh. They’re pretty much everywhere here, don’t worry about it. Just make a lot of noise and stick together.”
Tourist: Speechless. Mouth open and horrified expression on face.
Me: “Well, the hike up Peninsula street to the Co-Op grocery store is pretty nice too.”

*

Ucluelet is a hard name to pronounce but this was the best yet…

Tourist: “So, how do you like living in Uhk-a-lat?
Me: ” Oh I love Uhk-a-lat!”

*

Last, but certainly not least, are the tourists who
absolutely DO NOT need your advice because they’ve got everything all
figured out, thank you very much. And of all these types the “Tough
Fisherman” is the one I love the most…

I like to ask people if they’ve fished on the west coast before because
it can be quite a shock to a newbie.  The Prez and I have spent
hundreds of hours on the water here, we know all about the water
conditions and generally expect to be fishing in at least
a five foot swell but to someone who’s never been out there a five foot
swell can seem really scary. Now, add in the fact that the boats at
McFishing are large, sit high on the water, and only do drift fishing
which means they turn sideways to the waves…think of a large pendulum
rocking from side to side to side. Feeling queasy yet?  There is a
reason we call our fishing fleet  “The Ukee Pukee’s” and why we
refer to our buffet breakfast as the “rental breakfast”.

So, being the kind soul that I am, I will tell new arrivals, “If
you haven’t already got some seasickness medication, I suggest you get
some now. Take one tonight, one as soon as you wake up, and don’t eat
anything greasy or acidic for breakfast”. Then they reply…

Are you ready for this??

“I don’t need that stuff, I’ll just tough it out.“

If you’ve never been seasick, let me just explain, there is NO
toughing it out. Big, strong, grown men have been reduced to
whimpering, crying babies on the water. Last year a guest (one of those
big tough guys) offered the skipper $1000 plus a reimbursement of all
the other guests trips if he would turn the boat around and go in. My
friend, Crazy Mike, told me that when he was seasick he would have cut
his own head off if he had a knife handy – that’s how unpleasant it is.

“I don’t need that stuff, I’ll just tough it out.”

After all, what could I possibly know being a girl and all? So I just smile and say “OK, no worries”
and on the bus ride back to the airport I make sure I’m eating
something really greasy and saucy when I hover over their curled up,
sweaty, pale green body and say, “So tough guy, how about them French Lessons?”  Wink, wink.

Until next week, I hope this finds you healthy, happy & lovin’ life!
The Princess

 

Posted in Environment, Ocean, Travel, Women's Issues | 1 Comment

Harry Potter and the Half Dead Shark

Posted on July 27, 2005 by clubfredbaja

Hello again from the land of whales, Wallys & wetness!

I haven’t had a week this interesting in a very long time.

First, HP6 (that’s Harry Potter and the Half Blood prince – book number
6 – by the way) was finally released and I recieved my pre-ordered copy
in the mail. Joy! Fred finally had to drag me off to bed at 3:00am that
evening as my eyes were firmly glued to the page. I am pleased to
report that #6 was every bit as good (and more) as I hoped it would be!

Second, we had our annual local festival “Ukee Days” which I did not
get to enjoy as I was working my tail off at McFishing. Well, that’s
not entirely true – I did get to participate in part of it. It is a
tradition that during Ukee days a car drives around with speakers and a
megaphone to wake everyone up for the festivities. This year the driver
was a co-worker of mine, and the Prez and I had the pleasure (?) of
being woken up from a long overdue sleep-in by the Beach Boys blasting
‘Surfin’ USA‘ and Anton belting out “WAKE UP KRISTENE, IT’S
UUUUUUKKKEEEEE DAAAAAAAYS!!!!!” from the megaphone. (Note to self:
remove Anton from Xmas list)

Third, my sister and family came for a visit. The weather was gorg and
the fishing was stupid (Translation: It was sunny and calm out and we
had very good fishing). Even my, water-phobic nephew, Scott, had fun
and caught a salmon. My sister and her husband both had perma-grins for
most of the trip.

But here’s the event of the week that I really want to talk about and it involves sharks… and Harry Potter:

One of my jobs at McFishing is to go down to the dock and take photos
of the ‘big’ fish that come in. It’s pretty fun watching people
grinning next to their salmon and halibut. I grit my teeth when the big
Ling Cod are brought in because their numbers are pathetically low but
I console myself with the knowledge that the fish will be eaten. Last
Wednesday, however, I rounded the corner to see a 6 foot Blue shark
hanging off the scale and felt my stomach plummet. I do not support or
particpate in the killing of sharks.

Why? You may ask. I mean isn’t  the only good shark a dead shark?
Love them or hate them, the world shark population is in serious
jeopardy from commercial fishing. About 1 million sharks are killed
each year – by 2017 we could see the extinction of nearly 20 shark
species! And just in case you’re wondering, there were 7 human fatalies
from shark attacks in 2004 – hmmmm 7 vs. 1 million, I think we’re
the dangerous predator. Our toothy friends are a vital part of the
marine ecosystem and without them many, many more marine species will
suffer.

Oh ya, and I don’t believe in killing anything just for the sake of killing it and putting it on a wall.

So here I am on the dock, out of sight of the shark killers and
gawkers, trying to figure out how to handle this tactfully – it is,
after all, my job to take the photos and make everyone happy. Should I
just leave and feign an illness? Should I go against my principles and
take the darn picture? I mean, it’s not like it’s an everyday
occurence; it probably won’t ever happen again so why rock the dock?

Then I thought of Harry Potter…yes you read that correctly.

You see, one of the traits I find so admirable and appealling about the
character of Harry, one of the reasons I think the book is a must-read
for children, is that he often finds himself in situations where
sticking to what he believes in will make his life difficult and turn
everyone against him and yet he does not compromise. Harry knows the
truth and cannot pretend otherwise – and if that is a quality that I
admire then that is a quality I should aspire to.

I decided to stick to my guns but to remain low key so as not to upset
the guests. I handed the camera off to a puzzled dockhand with
instructions to take the photo. He asked me why and I, discreetly, told
him. He took the photo but he also broadcast, very loudly, to the
entire dock what an idiot I was. While I waited for the shark to go
away so that I could take the other photos, I listened to my coworkers
and realized that I had instantly  become unpopular.  But I
was smiling – thanks Harry.

If you’d like some more info on sharks, here are just a few websites to check out:
Bite-Back
Guy Harvey Research Institute
Shark Trust

Until next week, I hope this finds you healthy, happy & lovin’ life!

The Princess

 

Posted in Animals, Environment, Nature & Environment, Ocean, Travel | Leave a comment

The Worst Kind of Divorce

Posted on July 20, 2005 by clubfredbaja
Hello again from the land of whales, Wallys and wetness!

Well, I had this huge rant all written out about life in Ukee – mostly
about the frustrations of life in Ukee actually – and then…I went
back to the city. Life in Ukee is not so bad really. I won’t lie, the
city has some good stuff that I miss. What’s the best thing about the
city? Movie theatres? Starbucks? My writer’s group?  My gym?
Osamu’s Sushi?  Planet Organic Grocery Store? No. The best thing
about the city is that a whole bunch of people that I really love live
there. My friends. Tied with my husband for "Most Important Thing in my
Life" and if it wasn’t for them, I wouldn’t bother going back to the
city at all.

My visit was short (2 nights) but definitely sweet.

The Macs put me up for night one. Ron cooked up a yummylicious dinner
on the spur of the moment. Prawns….mmmmmm. Deb and I just got cooked
on Bombay Gin and Carolines. Hangover…mmmmmm. Night two was at the
Roney’s with refreshing cocktails and good conversation on the lanai.
The conversation turned to the subject of friends and two friends, in
particular, who have caused me some hurt feelings over the past year
and most recently have expressed that they want nothing more to do with
the Prez and me – I’ll call them Mickey & Minnie to protect their
identities.

The scoop: Mickey and Minnie have apparently had some real issues with
the Prez and me for years. You’d never know it by the way they act
around us, in fact you’d swear they were our very best friends in the
world by their behaviour. About a year ago, under some unusual
circumstances, a good friend finally told me all that had been said
about the Prez and me over the years – it was bad. If you had listened
very closely that day I’m certain you could have heard my heart
breaking. Imagine finding out that someone you really love and speak
highly of to everyone you know actually can’t stand you to the point of
not wanting you in their home. I suspect, if you are old enough, you
don’t have to imagine because everyone has been let down or betrayed by
someone they loved at one point.

So what do you do? A younger me would have picked up the phone a long
time ago and spewed all my hurt and outrage at them, but the older me
knows what a waste of time that is and would never risk putting the
friend who confided in me in a bad position. So what do you do?

With the opposite sex, at least you get closure. Words are spoken,
posessions are divided up, tears are cried, documents are signed…you
are divorced. How do you divorce a friend?

There are only about six people who even know about this little problem
– even Mickey and Minnie don’t know that I know. Weddings, parties,
dinners – with divorced couples everyone knows and delicately decides
which person to invite to which function. More often than not, friends
are divided up in the divorce as well so the decision is easy. But I
know we will see Mickey & Minnie around and just the thought puts
my stomach into knots because I know that I will not be able to fake it.

The Prez and I have our quirks and faults, everyone does. As friends
you accept that people aren’t perfect, you accept that we are all
different but we can still love each other. The Prez may step on a lot
of toes at times, may not always say what he thinks tactfully and
offend without meaning to – but he is honest and loyal beyond compare.
Even knowing all that he does, he bears no ill will toward Mickey &
Minnie but, instead, feels sorry for them, feels that they must be
having some troubles in their life. Me? I feel humiliated and betrayed.
If there were divorce papers for friends I would sign them today. Some
days I wish I were more like my husband.

Ten years from now I won’t be giving any of this a second thought.
Twenty years from now I might say "Mickey and Minnie who?". Thirty
years from now I’ll look at their photo and remember only the good
laughs we had once. Forty years from now – when I’m living with my 100
cats and making knitted hats – I might invite them over for biscuits
and a martini.

But today…it hurts.

So what would you do?

Until next week, I hope this finds you healthy, happy & lovin’ life!

The Princess

Posted in Friends | 1 Comment

They’re baaaaaaaaack…

Posted on July 5, 2005 by clubfredbaja
Hello from the land of whales, Wallys & wetness!
 
To all my regular Chronicle readers…welcome back! You have NO idea how much I’ve missed you. And to those of you just reading for the first time let me give you the whole long story the way hollywood would do it in a movie trailer:
   “They were a couple of thrill seeking stunt performers living life on the edge until one day they walked away from it all to start a new life in paradise… but paradise had a few surpises for them! Now they’re on the adventure of a lifetime. Join the Princess, the Prez and their grouchy cat Emily as they battle the raging sea in the Bahamas, party with the rascals of Key Largo, save the turtles in the jungles of Costa Rica, search for the meaning of life deep in the Baja desert and wind up washed up on the shores of Ucluelet – the end of the world!!”
 
So here we are in Ucluelet – or “Ukee” as the locals call it – wondering, yet again, what we are going to do with the rest of our lives. For those who are curious, Ukee is located on the West Coast of Vancouver Island and is about as far west as you can get in Canada. Rugged, remote and rainy…three good words to describe our home but also stunningly beautiful with wicked sportfishing and tons of wildlife.
 
The Prez’s internet business continues its long, steady climb up the search engines and there isn’t much to be done in that department for awhile so we have actually gone out and gotten real…it’s almost hard to say…JOBS…ouch!!!! The Prez is working as a sportfishing guide (and a damn fine one too, I might add) out of one of the local resorts and I am working at a rival resort as a kind of guest services/boat liaison kind of person. Emily has found that she can eat, sleep and make our lives miserable just as well here as in any of the many countries she’s lived in recently. All of our jobs are temporary as the season ends here, basically, at the end of September. After that…?????????? 
 
Believe me, I will have lots of juicy tidbits about living and working in a small town at the end of the world in upcoming Chronicles!
 
But let me start off my new rants by speaking a bit about patriotism. I hope that everyone in Canada and the USA enjoyed their respective National birthday celebrations. I’ve never been a big Canada Day celebrator, like most Canadians I tend to keep the flag waving to a minimum as to not offend anyone, but this year the Prez and I actually went out and attended an actual Canada Day Party and actually had a lot of fun. OK, the party was in Ukee (population 2500) and consisted of a band playing cover tunes on a flatbed truck with two lights and a miniature disco ball suspended from a crane but it was a party nonetheless. At one point the band (The Fish Net Stockers – we’re a fishing town, how can you tell?) broke into ‘O Canada’ and everyone, including yours truly, proudly sang along. I feel proud of my country for the first time I can remember. Why? Good question.
 
I am proud that we stuck to our guns (not that we actually have guns, they’re really frowned upon here) and did not jump into a war that is turning into Vietnam part II. I am proud that, however flawed our medical system may be, the doctors in Nanaimo gave my sister-in-law top notch treatment for her cancer and she didn’t have to go bankrupt for it. I am proud that my brother-in-law and his partner can legally be married – they love each other and deserve that right.
 
I do not consider myself patriotic. Countries are merely lines on a map and it is only through sheer luck that we are born where we are and not living like most of the people of the world in poverty, sickness and hunger. Our flags often become blindfolds, preventing us from seeing ourselves as other countries and cultures see us. Still, I do feel it is important to celebrate when our country does something good – positive reinforcement, if you will – and so, to ‘my home and native land’…Happy (belated) Birthday, eh.
 
 
Until next time…
I hope this finds you healthy, happy & lovin’ life!
The Princess
Posted in General, Travel | 3 Comments