If it’s Garbage Day it Must be Wednesday

Hello again from the land of whales, Wallys and wetness!

One of the odd things that happens when you are unemployed and without
a regular schedule is that you lose track of time, even the days of the
week. In Baja we used to keep track of what day it was by which day the
vegetable truck came by; in Ukee we do the same except with the garbage
pick up. Garbage day is Wednesday and all is right with the world. Our
garbage man’s name is Chris – Ukee only has one garbage man – and I was
not always a big fan of his. You see Chris likes to crank his music up
very, very loud while he is making his early morning rounds. I did
finally discovery the method behind his madness. We have bears in Ukee,
lots of bears. Bears like to eat garbage and so the city bylaws state
that you cannot put your garbage out until 6am the day of pick up. One time we
put ours out the night before, we were not very popular with the
neighbours – our waste spread across the street like some giant Jackson
Pollock painting. As the Prez was getting up at 4:30 am most mornings
this summer, I was responsible for making sure the trash was put out on
time. A few times (yes, just a few) I slept in. I’d be snoozing away when a sound I can only reproduce as brackkzzzthypriphkjhkgikdlkjhakjs&&rfh would
come screaming from down the road. ‘Oh’ I’d think, yawning and rolling
over, ‘It’s just Chris and his Heavy Metal noise.’ Pause, then, ‘Oh my
god!!! It’s Chris!! Garbage Day!!’ Whereupon I’d leap from the bed,
tear downstairs in my pajamas, grab the garbage and race outside to get to the
end of the driveway before the truck did. Thanks to Chris and his noise
I (almost) never missed a day, which is important when your bin has
rotting fish flesh in it.

*

The
Prez is fired up over the whole tropical job thing, making lists,
revising lists, discussing possible scenarios with me, getting annoyed
with me when I disagree with the scenario, more lists, plans, packing for the move, and of course the selling of our "stuff".

Now I know the Prez would be happy if we could reduce our personal
belongings to one backpack each but I am a little more needy than that.
On a few occasions I’ve had to rescue items that were unceremoniously
tossed onto the "sell" pile. However, it does feel good to purge now
and then, and it is amazing how much stuff two people can accumulate in
a year and a half.

Ukee is a great place to sell used goods. Big City garage salers are a
savvy bunch. At our last moving sale in Port Coquitlam we were woefully
unprepared for the bargaining power of these professional garage
salers. We’d tell them that a bookcase, for example, was $50 and they’d
come back with, "I’ll give you ten bucks". Eventually we’d sell it for
some stupid price because we felt sorry for them, they looked poor,
they were immigrants, etc., then we’d watch them drive away in their
brand new Mercedes. Doh! In Ukee, where your shopping selection is
limited to the left hand side of the Co-Op grocery store, we could ask
$100 for that same bookcase and the person would say, "Wow! What a
great deal! Quick load it in my truck before someone outbids me!"

Yesterday we took all of our remaining goods to the annual Flea Market
at the Rec Hall. This could very well be the highlight of the social
scene in this town. People were actually lined up outside the door
prior to opening. We were mobbed, goods were flying off our table. I
sold a pair of old pillowcases to a woman for a dollar and she gave me
two dollars saying, "A dollar just isn’t fair."

My favorite moment was on the drive home, after discussing our success,
when the Prez mused, "Gee I hope we get this job now that we’ve sold
everything we own." Hmmmm, yes.

*

We’ve
actually managed to get some exercise this week. There were two
non-rainy days and on one of them the sun came out – what’s that bright
shiny thing in the sky, run, run!! Our friend, Counsellor Dennis, took
us on a fabulous hike through the dunes on Wickanninish Beach. Fun yet
strangely unnerving as our route was preceded by a number of very fresh
bear tracks. The Counsellor told us that there is a very large black
bear in that area, that didn’t help.

I like bears, don’t get me wrong, I am a fan of bears. The Thornton
Creek fish hatchery is a primo bear watching site this time of year.
When staff at the hatchery are finished taking the eggs from the salmon
they put all the carcasses in a pile on the opposite side of the creek.
Bear Buffet. I mean the bears make a half-assed effort at going up the
stream and trying to catch the fish themselves (they really want the
eggs, that’s the best part) but eventually they kind of go, "Ugh, why
bother?" and mosy on over to take a fish off the pile. We lucked out
the day we went to bear watch, we were alone and saw a momma and three
cubs fishing. Later a large male showed up and the happy family bolted.

Boy bears can move fast.

I was thinking of this while we were following the bear tracks through the dunes.

*

Tomorrow
is a big day. I’m going to the doctor, an appointment I made in April.
Some of you may remember Pete the Costa Rican parasite. Well, as it
turns out Pete is most likely not a parasite but a case of
Endometriosis – Ack!

What is Endo? Here’s the Reader’s Digest version (men, you may want to
skip this, go out for a beer or something): Every month a woman’s body
gets ready to have a baby. The uterus gets lined with an endometrial
layer, the layer swells up, if the egg is fertilized it has a nice
cushy condo to lounge in for nine months, if there is no fertilization
then the endometrial layer sloughs off and is ejected – men you’ll know
when this is happening because it’s usually about the time when you can
do or say nothing right and we down entire vats of chocolate ice cream
while crying. The problem is, and apparently it is more common than
people realize, sometimes, in some people, endometrial cells get
outside the uterus and attach themselves hither and thither…"Oh look,
an ovary, how lovely!" or "Wow, from the spleen I’ll have a great view
of the lower intestines!"…then when they puff up they cause all kinds
of problems. Excruiating pain is the one that immediately comes to my
mind. Being outside the uterus and without access to the escape hatch,
these cells do not evacuate every month with the rest of their brothers
and sisters. Like bad tenants, they hang around, wreck things, and
cause all kinds of headaches.

There is no cure for Endo and treatments are only moderately effective.
So I’m not entirely sure what this specialist is going to tell me but
after 5 months of waiting it had better be good! I’ll keep you posted.

We’ll probably stop off and visit Mom after the doc but we’ll have to
get home the same night…the next day is Wednesday. Garbage Day!!

*

That’s
pretty much all the news for this week. We have a job interview on
Little Cayman Island on November 12th so we have over three weeks to
work ourselves up into a tizzy before we go.

Ah yes, one more thing before I go, you owe it to yourself to check out this website: Snopes
. Stop falling for urban/internet legends. I’m serious, click on the
"Hottest 25 Legends" and you will, undoubtably recognize some emails
that you have recieved and possibly forwarded. GREAT SITE. Everyone
should read it.

Until next week, I hope this finds everyone healthy, happy & lovin’ life!
The Princess



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One Response to If it’s Garbage Day it Must be Wednesday

  1. County says:

    FINALLY, someone is putting a stop to the "bill gates will send you 1000 dollars if you forward this!" emails… I HATE THEM! hahaHope you don\’t have endometriosis… it\’s awful.

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